Justly berated for leaving you hanging ;) .....I finally have good news to report. Our spermies are go - I repeat, spermies are go. Destination Sydney, ETA tuesday/wed next week. Yippededoodah!

I haven't had the heart to post until we got all that sorted. Its been a rough couple of weeks, chasing our tails and our clinics, calling the US sperm bank etc etc. If Old Clinic had just sent the info they had on file when we, and New Clinic requested it, NONE of this needed to happen. Stupidheads.

The DS was purchased through old clinic (OC), was from an o/s donor, so not depleting their stocks. Oh, did I mention they lost a vial in transit from one clinic to another? It was replaced with one they had in stock, but no-one took responsibilty - hence we travelled 1400km to our embryos to do the FET.
So we did the release paperwork at the clinic where the sperm is being held.
We signed the consent forms for the new clinic.
We were then asked to get copies of donor consent forms, blood tests etc to NC, from OC.
2 messages later, left fax # for NC, but donor co-ordinator never got back to us for me to be able to detail what NC required.

Called NC.
No, they haven't received required paperwork yet.

This is where the "he said-she said starts". OC claim they weren't told exactly what was necessary.
NC claims their scientist emailed requirements to OC.
OC called back and advised the scientists from OC and NC were sorting things out, the hold up was with NC.

THEN, the head scientist calls about 20 minutes later, to tell me that NC is the problem, they were given all the info that OC had (no, they only told NC what they didn't have), that NC were currently reviewing it (load of BS) and that NC had to make further enquiries. I explained the situation as I understood it, that NC needed actual copies of lab tests, letters and consent forms, not just profile information and assumed clearance. At this point, head scientist launches into how its taken them hours to get the information they have sent so far, that I shouldn't be involved at all, they normally ONLY deal with other clinics about this stuff, and how there is nothing in it for them. I think the last comment probably sums up their attitude the best. I explained that I appreciated that it has taken time, but we were asked by NC to get this information, and that I had the specifics and could provide them, and that no-one at NC had previously said they would make sure the correct information was sent, or that NC would handle everything. That was in fact the reason I had called last week, and to find out if they did have access to it (because we were told they'd have to look for it). Reason being, if they didn't I would have to contact the sperm bank directly.

Subject was changed by head scientist, and he didn't ONCE say, yes please, here's my email/fax, send that through so we have the details. He also told me that speaking to the nurse earlier today was a total waste of time as she had nothing to do with it. I told him it wasn't, and she had actually tried to get the donor co-ordinator for me, but was unable, but said she would track her down in person to call me back since I hadn't been called back last week. And since the donor-coord had called me back, I actually considered it quite helpful.

It was like pulling teeth every time I called him on something and wanted details, and I was NOT nasty at all. I can be, but I was very polite. And every time I asked for more details or tried explaining why we had called etc etc, he just shut down and gave blunt "thats not how we do things" answers. The answers we were getting the whole way were "thats up to them to organise". Blunt and dissinterested. But "they can't call us with every new development". I get that "there is nothing in it for them". And those are direct quotes by the way, no paraphrasing involved.
I was basically told they wanted nothing more to do with us and would no longer return our phone calls.

I get that they imported the sperm originally. I get that they might be a little put out that we've decided to switch clinics. But we've done 5 cycles with them, have had to endure screw ups, and this was not a decision we undertook lightly, we just felt the Dr at NC was better equipped to manage my cycle, and had better success rates. So now we're punished for it. I mean, the entire conversation with the head scientist could have been much more positive if he wasn't stupidly arrogant and blunt about it all and telling me to keep out.

NC disputes much of what OC claimed. Oh. joy.

I advised I would be able to get no further with OC, and that OC advised me they would only deal with NC. Was asked to try to get required documents directly from sperm bank, who I immediately emailed.

So. Still no joy and nothing recieved by NC a week later, no response by email from sperm bank. I called the satellite clinic locally, that still holds the sperm and asked who I could go to since Brisbane had shut me down and basically said they wouldn't return my phone calls. The didn't want to get involved, but about 15 minutes after the conversation called me back (I think it might have had something to do with me asking who could actually be my advocate...). They'd spoken to the head scientist, and could I fax through the requirements. Now, that indicates a number of things to me:
1. Scientist didn't listen when I told him I had the requirements in front of me the week before and was happy to provide them to the clinic. I guess thats why he's in the lab and not dealing with patients.
2. NO-ONE had ever sent any of the paperwork to NC that they had on file
3. He isn't able to rely on any of his staff to do either of the above anyway.
4. He doesn't bother to get the story straight from all of HIS people before berating me for chasing them.

I mean, if they had just sent on what they had, when initially asked, I wouldn't have continued bugging them!

So they emailed me the blood tests and donor profile, and said they had the informed consent on file (didn't forward to NC as requested). I then requested that this be specifically forwarded to NC, and Oh my God, the fact that I had to dog them every step of the way drives me insane.

There were still a couple of details on the list that OC couldn't provide information for, however. After contacting the US sperm bank to try and get additional details, I was told they'd have to check with the clinic they supply in NSW, since they have an exclusive agreement to supply sperm to only that clinic in that state. AAAAAARRGGH

I understand why, but it meant they weren't able to release further information to OUR clinic in NSW! Kieran called the other clinic, and they were no more helpful - no, they wouldn't make an exception basically. So it looked like we wouldn't be able to use our donor at the new clinic, would have to go on their waiting list and hope something came up in the next 6-12 months.

I felt sick at the thought. Waiting 12 months between cycles until another "shot" at a donor came up???

So we contacted our clinic to let them know, and see if there was a chance the paperwork had been received, and might, just might, be adequate. They're happy to organise the shipping of the spermies. The paperwork they need is in order, we don't need to organise anything else, and we're on for a november cycle!!!The ups and downs have been awful, because I already felt like we'd worked so hard to get to this point, so to feel like we couldn't use our donor was a huge blow. I know there are bigger things to worry about, but geez it was a rough day yesterday!

Top that off with euthanasing a pregnant cat and speying a pregnant dog and I only ended up in tears twice. Not bad, considering.

Oh yeah, work still really sucks.

And its only a week until Kieran has his second urethroplasty. Fingers crossed this one works without any problems. And we're getting testicular histopath done to see if there is maybe a lone sperm somewhere. Since there was only cytology done in 2005.

Dogs are good, trying to clean and purge the house - belated spring cleaning. I could go NUTS, but Kieran won't let me :(
I want the spare room cleaned out and all the painting stuff moved into the office/guest room before the IVF. Making space for a successful IVF. My mother is convinced this one will work for some reason. She actually asked me about who I'd have deliver the not-yet-conceived munchkin. I'm still trying to wrap my head around my roster and who can work saturdays for me so I can get to sydney for the treatment....but I did answer her question. *sigh* Is it wishful thinking, blind hope, positive thinking? Or just setting oneself up for a fall?

This time, I'm not even trying. If I want a glass of wine before transfer, I'll have it thankyou.....right up to the rim please. And if I'm having a bad day, I'll just wallow for a few hours and have a bad day. Stuff the positive thinking, pretty flowery, girly pleasantness. I'll do what I need to stay sane.

But I will be taking my snowdrop everywhere. Do you think I could sneak it into theatre for egg retrieval?